I didn't set out to do this, it just sort of happened...

3:00 PM

In... and out...


*climbs through forest of rabid dust bunnies, crawls around piles of jackets I forgot to hang up and peels back layers upon layers of cobwebs to reveal the confused entity that may or may not sit under this epic url*

*begins typing*

Hello fellow humanoids. How has everyone been? It's uh... it's been a while, eh? A long while. I hope you've had as wonderful a while since our last encounter as I have. I hope you've all been getting ready for Halloween, feeling Autmn-y and such. I hope you've picked out whopping baby pumpkins and there is a random bowl of gourds galore in the middle of your dining room table right now. Or whatever you do to celebrate.


I thought I'd climb back up on my high and mighty wheely desk chair once again so I could inform you, my lovely readers, of the progress I've made (don't roll your eyes! Let me explain - ). You see, breaking away from things that I cause to consume my time gives me more time to think. And it isn't until I'm in the midst of my break that I realize how stressed out I make myself, and I get these "aha!" moments that just click - it's like getting your spine realigned.

Not that I've ever had that done. But I'm sure it's like that.

(I think I'm funny.)

Back to the matter at hand, I've discovered some interesting things about myself while I've been "away", and I thought I would take this moment to be transparent - because what's better than now?

I've been using this internet space to become someone I'm not.

And it shows. It really, truly does. What the heck have I been thinking all year? That churning out rando (yes, I meant to put that word here) blog tips was going to get me somewhere? Errrrrrrrgh. Rosie...

I don't know what to do anymore.
It's like I'm an unknown entity within myself. It's like I'm a dramatic abyss of emotion and tangled knots of hair! I like writing and web design and those small, sometimes creepy things and I - know what the problem is now.

I'm trying to fit myself into a mold -
And unsurprisingly, I don't seem to fit.

The stuff I post on my blog from here on out is probably going to be experimental. I want to find who I am. I want to find my "clicking topics" - my niche, my Internet contribution, my self. The "thing" that God says is mine to share...

I don't know how I'm going to do this, but I need to focus on bigger things.
Like, my future. College. Getting a job. Those stressful things I tell other people not to get stressed over. And what happens when I think about those things, I make blogging an excuse - whether it be to not accomplish those things, or to make myself feel worse because I have to let it slide - and it piles up. I get stressed. Irritated in ways that are un-motivating...

I miss writing. I missing expressing. I miss working hard on projects and getting feedback from you. I miss being dramatic and getting encouraged and encouraging others and using waaaay too many and's in my sentences! I miss -

I miss you guys.
You don't have to say you miss me too. But I want to slowly begin immersing myself back into the blogging world. I want to comment on blogs, build friendships, learn about you. I want to build people up and inspire. I want to grow.

All this to say:

I'm coming back guys!

You just might have to wait on me for a little while...

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0 Sweet Notes

All comments I receive are cherished for many hours after reading them. Thank you for taking the time to type something to me.

xx Nicole Rose