Skip to main content

How to deal with loneliness.

Have you ever felt like you were separated from reality? Or separated from people - material things, possessions of the world. The outside. Have you felt as though you were trapped behind walls and no matter how hard you kicked, punched or screamed, you couldn't knock them down and no one would could hear you. You were unheard within yourself.

You felt alone. Abandoned in your time of need. Maybe you're feeling these things right now. Whatever the case, here are four steps you can take in dealing with the lonely isolation you feel.


1. Loneliness is a feeling...

Not a fact. You are feeling this isolation not because you truly are alone, but because something - a memory, perhaps - has triggered this response within you. Our brains are designed to notice feelings of pain, especially feelings that scare you. That's why loneliness is so prominent - it's very easy to notice.

As you try to make sense of your feelings, you may ask yourself, "Why am I feeling this? Is it because I'm not loved? Because I'm a loser?" Your theories can become confused with facts, making your problem seem bigger than it truly is. Realize that you are feeling alone, and then learn to accept that without over-analyzing or overreacting.

2. Reach out.

When I feel lonely or unloved, I react by drawing within myself. I hide. I mope. And it doesn't help my situation at all. So I encourage you to reach out. Express your feelings, treat yourself to something good. Taking a nice long bath works well for me, especially if I'm starting to feel stressed or pent up. Find what works for you. It may be going out with friends, talking to your parents or reading a good book. Whatever it is, do it. Take that step toward emotional recovery.

3. Notice your thoughts.

Inner dialogue is something that plays a huge role in your emotional level. What you're thinking is essentially what you say. The small, personally hurtful comments can pile up and weigh down your self-esteem until you're sitting in bed crying about being alone and unloved forever. So make sure to deal with those inner critics and downing thoughts.

4. Find people who can relate.

The world is a big place. Odds are someone out there has felt the same way you do. Go search for them. Seek them out and make connections. BUT be careful when conducting this point. Surfing the web for someone whom you can cling to and throw your problems at isn't the greatest idea. Try searching in the relationships you have now before branching out. If you don't find someone, don't get discouraged. They're out there. You just have to look in the right places.

How do you deal with loneliness? 


Thank you for reading.
xx Nicole Rose

Comments

  1. Reminds me of that song from Into the Woods, "No One Is Alone." Thank you for this.

    xoxo Morning

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you, these were great tips. Especially number 3. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is super helpful! I've had some pretty major issues the past few months and this is definitely how I would deal with it! Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I love your point about it being a feeling, not fact. So often we get to caught up in our emotions that we cant step back and see the reality that we are loved and we aren't alone. Thumbs up, Nicole.

    Chloe | Curious Ramblings

    ReplyDelete
  5. Nicole, you're, like, a counselor. Your posts are so helpful and I swear I remember them when I'm in a situation that you've dealt with.

    I too often let my inner dialogue run crazy. Imagining those thoughts being burnt away inside a trash can *giggle* has helped a lot.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

All comments I receive are cherished for many hours after reading them. Thank you for taking the time to type something to me.

xx Nicole Rose

Popular posts from this blog

How to Begin Your Self-Love Journey This Year

When I originally had the idea for this piece of writing I’m about to share with you, I was in a place of transition. I didn’t know my place in the world, I didn’t know if I was worth it and I certainly didn’t feel like I could love myself. Here I am almost a year later, an example of how this works - if you choose to put it into practice. You can improve and learn to love yourself. You can take the steps that bring you into a better place.

I won’t say it was easy and I certainly won’t say I had overnight success, but when you learn to fight your battles one at a time, you’ll be able to look back and see how far you’ve come.

Are you ready to take the first step?



Self Love: Step one I have always been a timid person. I’ve always had trouble keeping the standards I have for myself something below what I deem “perfect”. I enjoy discipline and when I don’t know what to do or my world is shaken, I’m hard on myself.

That’s just who I am.

With that said, I've always felt like I was not a…

A Love Letter

To my dear, blooming Rose - Attached to this letter is not only my love, but my gratitude, thankfulness and a small box of decadent dark chocolates. I would've had flowers delivered too, but no measly plant could ever compare or express my feelings toward you.

Ahh, my dear. You are my truest bundle of joy. It does not matter what mood you are in - you light up my day in the most wonderful of ways.

Your smile makes the sun jealous. Your embrace makes me feel full. Your laughter - so thick and loud - makes me want to laugh too.

What I love most is when you are truly and purely being yourself - because that's who you're meant to be.

With much love and kisses blown with a wink,
Your Secret Admirer

PS: Maybe we could share those chocolates later, eh?


+ + +
When you need some uplifting, write yourself a love letter. Be silly and positive. Analyze yourself. Amp up your best qualities. De-sock your feet as you write and wiggle your toes as your write (then put your socks back on b…

How to Manage Your Creative Time

Being productive can be hard, especially when you have too many things on your to-do list, and have no idea where to start. As a human who likes to pack a lot of stuff into their day, I've struggled with managing my blogging time and balancing it with everything else I need to do.

Here are some tips to help you manage your time (whether it be for blogging or anything else). :)


Being productive can be hard, especially when you have too many things balanced on your plate. Most of the time, you don’t know where to start. As a human who likes to pack a lot of productivity into their day, I’ve struggled with managing my time - creatively and in the other areas of my life. The balancing act is hard, so I’ve compiled some of the tips that work best for me.


PS: There’s a link to a print out of the exercises that correspond with these tips at the bottom of this!

Figure out what needs to be done Before you can manage your time, you need to figure out what it is you want to get done. Do you w…