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Lately, I find myself...

.

Sometimes I find myself wiggling around for no reason. Or I'm making weird faces to myself while I shuffle our old deck of cards. Sometimes I find myself with my fingers in my hair, twirling and twisting, attempting to make my tangled locks into something pretty--or maybe I do it just to busy myself.

Lately I've found I can't stop singing (unless I'm concentrating really hard). I look at my reflection in the bathroom, studying myself, just for a few minutes. My face, which drops to look at my shoulders, rib cage and so on. Again, my fingers are in my hair, attempting to make it look I remembered to brush it after I took a shower. My hips are getting utterly wide.

I've let myself listen to "(Kissed You) Good Night", even though I teased my sister for listening to it. In random moments in time, I find myself, turned out, gripping a shelf or chair or digging my fingers into the wall as I study my legs. I like to see how long I can balance on my tip toes or how many turns I can do in bare feet--just to see if I've lost my touch.

I've been working on other things, when I should be typing out twelve hundred (1200) words a day.

I've forgotten to post.

School just doesn't...work for me.

Am I slipping? Or am I finally finding out who I really am?

xx Nicole Rose

Comments

  1. Oh My Gosh Rose,you blew my mind away. I just can't tell you how amazing that way. Okay so am I the only one who started singing I Would By One Direction. "Lately I found myself thinking and dreaming about you a lot cause up in my head I'm your boyfriend." okay you get the point.
    And I know you are finding yourself and who you truly are

    ReplyDelete
  2. "If you ever feel alone- don't- you were never on your own, and the proof is on this song... " Sorry I just had to add this to your wonderful rambles. You are just so perfect Rosie. <3

    ReplyDelete
  3. This post is indescribably and confusingly beautiful...I don't know how to put it into words - it's the kind of beautiful like when it's raining and the sun is shining at the same time, you know?
    It's perfect.

    ReplyDelete

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All comments I receive are cherished for many hours after reading them. Thank you for taking the time to type something to me.

xx Nicole Rose

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