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Why hold on?

^^^ That.
I do that.
I do that to myself.
I shut down.
I tell myself the same things.
I get depressed.
I tend to push others away,
especially the people that I know actually care. just gets so unbearable, yah know?
You feel like nothing is worth the pain you feel.
You're ready to end it.
You're ready to feel that sweet thing called relief.
You're ready to let it all go.

Because, why hold on when letting go is so much easier?
Sometimes, I want myself to let go.
I want to feel that relief.
I want to know what's like to be pain-free.
But something--someone stops me every time.

I wouldn't want to hurt them.
I know they care--probably too much.
So I hold on, for their sake.
And pray relief comes soon.

thanks for reading this dramatic--and hard to write--post. <3
xx Nicole Rose


  1. oh, Rose, that's ME too. i'm the same exact way. it hurts so much, so often. i can't let myself understand the truth, no matter how hard i try. this is one post i am totally going to be quoting from in the future. :)

    1. you too? well I'm so glad you understand. :} I'd hate to be alone in this... and aww shucks. :) I'm so flattered. :D

  2. ...that was beautiful Rosie. and I want you to know that I understand... I understand it all. I feel the exact same way and I do that quite often. Maybe sometimes you can tell through my texts. :P But enough about me.
    I love you, Rose. And I'm ALWAYS going to be here for you NO MATTER <--- no. matter. what. okay? I know it's hard sometimes and you don't feel like believing me because why would you? when it is so much easier to think otherwise. to down yourself. but I won't ever give up on you. I swear to it. Okay? I'm always going to be here for you. you can shut me out, push me away.. whatever you want to do. but I will always be here for you. :) you're my hg buddy and that's what we're here for. to keep each other from feeling alone. <3


    actually, that isn't possible for you.

    sorry for the long and personal comment... I just wanted to to know that. •-•




    1. oh jeez. * sniffles * thank you, Kenz. thank you SO much. w-what did I do to deserve such a flawless girl like yourself? you are WAY too good for me. <3

      ...i'm ain't flawless.

      don't be sorry. i loved it. * sniffles * A LOT.


      I LOVE KENZ SO MUCH MORE! ...than she could possibly ever think to acknowledge. •-•



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xx Nicole Rose

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